1/27/2025
The other day, I was on UtaForum, and I saw a post about a
contest for one of my favorite UTAUs at the moment,
Meaty-chan. You make fanart or music of her, and whoever has the best entry in whatever catagory wins. Immediately,
I was pretty excited about it, and was already committing to the idea of making something for it. But then I
remembered that I wouldn't be able to receive physical merch, so I couldn't very well join. If there's even a
possibility that I'd win anything, I'd just be wasting everyone's time and taking away from someone who could
actually get a prize.
To me, these things aren't so much about the prize as they are about making art in a community with other people. I mean, technically,
I would have an easier time participating if there was no prize at all. It just feels like a big, fun event, you know? It's
nice to have something to be a part of. So I think I'll make an entry anyway, but not submit it, maybe just post
it on here and have that be it. If everyone else gets to have fun and make Meaty-chan art, why shouldn't I??? That's what
I think, anyway.
1/17/2025
I want to start collecting dolls. I really like them. I think they're cool. So what's stopping me?
Room, for one thing. Where would I even put them? Most people I see online have huge bookshelves
packed with dolls... I would really love to have something like that, something I could just stare
at and admire all the little details of. But I really don't think anything like that would be feasable
for me. I have no idea where I'd fit something like that.
But, I am ignoring an elephant in the room. Even if I didn't have room for an enormous collection, I could
definitely find some space for something. Even if it's not as much as I would like, it's better
than nothing. The primary reason behind me not getting any dolls is shame, and not wanting to be looked
down on by people in my real life. Like, obviously I know there's nothing objectively wrong with liking
dolls (I wouldn't be writing this if I didn't), but I'm human, and I like being liked and accepted,
and I don't like being hated and made fun of. And openly enjoying "childish" things like that would
make me a prime target for the latter.
So I've existed like that for a while. Wanting to do something, but not wanting to be perceived as doing it.
And, of course, what's the fun in having a doll collection when you can't make a fun display for them
and look at them? So I don't collect dolls. Mostly I watch YouTube videos and read social media posts and
live vicariously through other people's pictures. I'll react to news about
new doll releases. I'll get excited when something I like is revealed and disappointed when I see something
I don't like. And it's like... why? You're not getting the doll either way. What difference does it make?
You have no ponies in this race.
And then I feel weirdly guilty, like I'm some sort of undercover agent invading this online space and
pretending to be one of them. Like, do I really have a right to be here, in a community of people who
collect dolls, as a person who doesn't collect dolls? If someone else asked me a question like that, I
know my answer would be a resounding yes. Who's to tell you whether or not you're enjoying something "properly"?
So long as you're having fun, where's the issue? That's what everyone's here for, right? To have fun?
But I still hold that guilt. Like one day I'll be "found out" and exiled from the doll world before I even
get to really be a part of it.
... But then again, nobody's actually doing any of these things. Partially, I imagine it's
because I haven't shared this with anyone (except you, you lucky Internet user), but also because this is
really just me making up a scenario and being upset at it. Would the people I know actually hate doll
collectors? Maybe not. Does anyone even care enough about the things I do to hate them? I dunno.
Paradoxically I kind of hope they do. And anyway I do already collect virtual pets and I have a few Miku figures and stuff,
and would anyone actually see that as being any different?? The more I write, the more ridiculous I sound lol.
Anyway, I feel like it would be kind of a shame to end this entry on a sour note, so I figured I'd just show
off some dolls I would like to get! I would write commentary, but I don't actually think
I have too much to say apart from "I like them and I think they're cool!", so I'll just have some pictures
lol. They speak for themselves! Some of them maybe stretch the definition of "doll" a bit, but whatever!
It's my blog!
set/series - character and/or product name (brand)
* Monster Fest - Frankie Stein (Monster High) |
* Series 1 - Amber (Magic Mixies Pixlings) |
* Shimmerverse Series - Unia and Rainbow Star (Magic Mixies
Pixlings) |
* Int. Unicorn Ponies I - Twilight (MLP G1) |
* Unicorn Ponies I - Glory (MLP G1) |
* Royal Gem Carriage Bonus - Star Swirl (MLP G4) |
* Cocoa's Bakery Cafe - Cocoa (Wild Manes) |
* Perla's Clubhouse Trailer - Perla (Wild Manes) |
* Sweetie/Celestia 2Pack (Decora Girlz) |
1/5/2025
Okay, my blog is up! This website is looking more and more like... a website! It's
still far from finished, but I have to enjoy these small victories or I'll never get anything done
lol.
But I'm having trouble figuring out how to organize everything... Like, I have sections for lots of
different types of media, but what exactly should I put there? Media logs? But isn't that what blogs
are for? I know I'm probably supposed to write about my real life here, but I don't really have all that much
going on. I really should have thought this through a bit more, I'm kind of just plowing ahead right
now.
... Though I did just write a paragraph about nothing, so I'm sure I could figure something out.
Anyway, back to the grindstone with me!
